She Was So Fat That Her Clothes

I Told My Wife A Man Is Like Wine, He Gets Better With Age. She Locked Me In The Cellar.

I Tell Ya, My Wife's A Lousy Cook. After Dinner, I Don't Brush My Teeth. I Count Them.

He Who Laughs Last Didn't Get It In The First Place.

I Came From A Real Tough Neighborhood. On My Street, The Kids Take Hubcaps - From Moving Cars.

I Shouldn't Tell Jokes About My Wife. She's Attached To A Machine That Keeps Her Alive... The Refrigerator.