He Who Laughs Last Didn't Get It

It Would Be Great If People Never Got Angry At Someone For Doing Something They've Done Themselves.

A Homeless Guy Came Up To Me On The Street, Said He Hadn't Eaten In Four Days. I Told Him, "man, I Wish I Had Your Willpower.

I Saved A Girl From Being Attacked Last Night. I Controlled Myself.

Sure I Smoked Pot In Hospital. My Wife Won't Let Me Toke At Home.

I Told My Wife A Man Is Like Wine, He Gets Better With Age. She Locked Me In The Cellar.