My Wife Gives Good Headache.

For Christmas One Year I Bought My Son A Bb Gun. He Bought Me A T-shirt With A Bulls Eye On The Back.

Comedy Is In My Blood. Too Bad It's Not In My Act.

When I Was Born I Was So Ugly The Doctor Slapped My Mother.

I Looked Up My Family Tree And Found Out I Was The Sap.

I Don't Get No Respect. I Called Suicide Prevention. They Tried To Talk Me Into It.