My Mother-in-law Has Come Round To Our

I Was Sat At The Bottom Of The Garden A Week Ago, Smoking A Reflective Cheroot, Thinking About This And That - Mostly That, And I Just Happened To Glance At The Night Sky And I Marvelled At The Millions Of Stars Glistening Like Pieces Of Quicksilver Thrown Carelessly Onto Black Velvet. In Awe I Watched The Waxen Moon Ride Across The Zenith Of The Heavens Like An Amber Chariot Towards The Void Of Infinite Space Wherein The Tethered Bolts Of Jupiter And Mars Hang Forever In Their Orbital Majesty; And As I Looked At All This, I Thought, 'i Must Put A Roof On This Lavatory.

The Mother-in-law Had An Accident At Work. A Hot Rivet Dropped Down Her Drawers And She Fell Off The Oil Rig.

I've Just Had Some Bad News. Tomorrow Is The Mother In Law's Funeral. And She's Cancelled It.

I Went To The Doctor Last Week. I Said: 'can I Have Some Sleeping Pills For The Wife?' He Said: 'why?' I Said: 'she's Woke Up.

I've Got A Friend Who Is A Lion Tamer. He Used To Be A School Teacher Till He Lost His Nerve.