I'd Like To Thank The Bbc For

I'd Like To Thank The Bbc For Allowing Me To Work Here. And I'd Like To Thank The Wife And Kids For Making It Necessary.

I Took My Mother-in-law To Madame Tussaud's Chamber Of Horrors, And One Of The Attendants Said: 'keep Her Moving Sir; We're Stock-taking.'

The Way Prices Are Rising, The Good Old Days Are Last Week.

I Can Always Tell When The Mother In Law's Coming To Stay; The Mice Throw Themselves On The Traps.

Take My Wife... Please. I'm Not Saying She's Ugly, But When She Went To See A Horror Film, The Audience Thought She Was Making A Personal Appearance.