It's A Good Thing That Beauty Is

How Do You Know They're Growing Up? Well, The Bite Marks Are Higher.

I Want My Children To Have All The Things I Couldn't Afford. Then I Want To Move In With Them.

Doctors Say It's Okay To Have Sex After A Heart Attack, Provided You Close The Ambulance Door.

My Body's In Such Bad Shape I Wear Prescription Underwear.

Old Age Is When The Liver Spots Show Through Your Gloves.