I Wish I Had The Nerve Not

I Feel Now It's Useless To Keep Hoping. The Way Things Are Today, We Live In A World That Needs Laughter, And I've Decided If I Can Make People Laugh, I'm Making A More Important Contribution.

Women Are My Best Friends, My Best Audience. If I Look Out From The Stage And See A Lot Of Men, I Know I'm In Trouble

Comedy Is Exaggerated Realism. It Can Be Stretched To The Almost Ludicrous, But It Must Always Be Believable.

I Wish I Had The Nerve Not To Tip.

I'm Liberace Without A Piano.