I Took The Wife's Family Out For

I Need To Give Affection And Love, Because Without That, I Wither. I Need To Give That Love To Someone. Without That, I'm Rudderless.

I Used To Sell Furniture For A Living. The Trouble Was, It Was My Own.

My Mother-in-law Has Come Round To Our House At Christmas Seven Years Running. This Year We're Having A Change. We're Going To Let Her In.

I Saw Six Men Kicking And Punching The Mother-in-law. My Neighbour Said 'are You Going To Help?' I Said 'no, Six Should Be Enough.'

In Awe, I Watched The Waxing Moon Ride Across The Zenith Of The Heavens Like An Ambered Chariot Towards The Ebony Void Of Infinite Space Wherein The Tethered Belts Of Jupiter And Mars Hang, For Ever Festooned In Their Orbital Majesty. And As I Looked At All This I Thought... I Must Put A Roof On This Toilet.