Cars And Women Are A Lot Alike.

He Who Laughs Last Didn't Get It In The First Place.

I Figured Out I'm Bisexual. I Have Sex Twice A Year.

I Tell Ya, I Was An Ugly Kid. I Was So Ugly That My Dad Kept The Kid's Picture That Came With The Wallet He Bought.

I'm Tellin' Ya I Get No Respect. When I Was In Switzerland, I Got An Obscene Yodel.

Do Ya Remember The First Time You Had Sex? I Do, And Boy, Was I Scared! I Was Alone!