Cars And Women Are A Lot Alike.

My Wife And I Have Olympic Sex. Once Every Four Years.

I Told My Psychiatrist That Everyone Hates Me. He Said I Was Being Ridiculous - Everyone Hasn't Met Me Yet.

Last Time I Tried To Make Love To My Wife Nothing Happened, So I Said To Her, 'what's The Matter, You Can't Think Of Anybody Either?'

It Was The Same Thing In The Army, No Respect. They Gave Me A Uniform That Glowed In The Dark.

When You Walk Up Five Flights Of Stairs At Four In The Morning, There's Definitely A Hooker Involved.