List Of Hilarious Quotes

There Are A Number Of Mechanical Devices Which Increase Sexual Arousal, Particularly In Women. Chief Among These Is The Mercedes-benz 380sl Convertible.

Confidence Is The Sexiest Thing A Woman Can Have. It's Much Sexier Than Any Body Part.

I See Myself As An Intelligent, Sensitive Human, With The Soul Of A Clown Which Forces Me To Blow It At The Most Important Moments.

Girls, If A Boy Says Something That Isn't Funny, You Don't Have To Laugh.

Take Your Risks Now; As You Become Older, You Become More Fearful And Less Flexible. And I Mean That Literally. I Hurt My Knee This Week On The Treadmill, And It Wasn't Even On.

Anybody Who Doesn't Make You Feel Good, Kick Them To The Curb. And The Earlier You Start In Your Life, The Better.

There's Power In Looking Silly And Not Caring That You Do.

If You Steal From One Author It's Plagiarism; If You Steal From Many It's Research.

A Stockbroker Urged Me To Buy A Stock That Would Triple Its Value Every Year. I Told Him, 'at My Age, I Don't Even Buy Green Bananas.'

Everything Is Funny, As Long As It's Happening To Somebody Else.

All I Know Is Just What I Read In The Papers, And That's An Alibi For My Ignorance.

Diplomacy Is The Art Of Saying 'nice Doggie' Until You Can Find A Rock.