List Of Funny Life Quotes

If You Wish To Forget Anything On The Spot, Make A Note That This Thing Is To Be Remembered.

Promises Are Like Crying Babies In A Theater, They Should Be Carried Out At Once.

There's Birth, There's Death, And In Between There's Maintenance.

People Say That Money Is Not The Key To Happiness, But I Always Figured If You Have Enough Money, You Can Have A Key Made.

On The Whole, Human Beings Want To Be Good, But Not Too Good, And Not Quite All The Time.

Planned Obsolescence Is Not Really A New Concept. God Used It With People.

I Must Confess, I Was Born At A Very Early Age.

I Intend To Live Forever, Or Die Trying.

I Would Challenge You To A Battle Of Wits, But I See You Are Unarmed!

Life Is Not Worth Living If I Cannot Have Pasta Or Bread Again.

Make No Mistake About Why These Babies Are Here - They Are Here To Replace Us.

If I Can Sell Tickets To My Movies Like Red Sonja Or Last Action Hero, You Know I Can Sell Just About Anything.