You Might Be A Redneck If You

You Might Be A Redneck If You Watch Little House On The Prairie For Decorating Tips.

The More Excited The Rooster Gets, The Higher His Voice Goes. He's Got A Little Bit Of A Barney Fife Quality To Him.

Hell, When I Was In High School, A "drive-by Shooting" Meant Somebody Had Their Rear End Hanging Out A Car Window!

Did You Know Babies Are Nauseated By The Smell Of A Clean Shirt? You Put On Something From The Cleaners, They're Gonna Spit Up Just Like That. My Wardrobe Looks Like We Have Condors Living In Our Yard.

For The First Time Ever I Was Taking The Family On The Road. We Stayed With My In-laws, Which On Life's List Of Experiences Ranks Right Below Sitting In A Tub Full Of Scissors.