You Might Be A Redneck If You

It's Like Cuddling With A Butterball Turkey.

It's Not My Dreams That Get Me In Trouble, It's What My Wife Dreams I Did. My Wife Punched Me In The Middle Of The Night; I Woke Up And Went Oww! What Was That For?, And She Goes I Dreamt You Were Making Out With Faith Hill. I Said I Wasn't Dreaming Anything! Send Her Over To My Dreams, And We'll Both Be Happy.

We Sing About God Because We Believe In Him. We Are Not Trying To Offend Anybody, But The Evidence That We Have Seen Of Him In Our Small Little Lives Trumps Your Opinion About Whether Or Not He Exists.

You Might Be A Redneck If You Give Your Dad A Gallon Of Pepto-bismol For His Birthday.

You Might Be A Redneck If The Salvation Army Declines Your Mattress.