You Know What Keeps Me Humble? Mirrors!

Most Children Threaten At Times To Run Away From Home. This Is The Only Thing That Keeps Some Parents Going.

The Last Thing My Kids Ever Did To Earn Money Was Lose Their Baby Teeth.

Your Husband Is Lazy If When He Leaves The House, He Finds Out Which Way The Wind Is Blowing And Goes That Direction.

Just Because I Have Rice On My Clothes Doesn't Mean I've Been To A Wedding. A Chinese Man Threw Up On Me.

All I Ever Learned At My Mother's Knee Was What A Bony Knee Looked Like.