Whenever I Play With Him , I

It Was A Typically British Birth... I Was Three At The Time. They Had A Strike In The Maternity Ward... I Came Out In Sympathy.

Everybody Is Afraid They Won't Have Any Money After They Die, But Jack Benny Discovered A Way To Take It With Him. He Had His Appendix Taken Out And A Piggy Bank Put In.

I Like A President Who Tells Jokes Instead Of Appointing Them.

When We Recall The Past, We Usually Find That It Is The Simplest Things - Not The Great Occasions - That In Retrospect Give Off The Greatest Glow Of Happiness.

My Old Friend Jack Benny Has Only Had One Ball All His Golfing Life. And Now He's Lost It. The String Came Off!