What A Dog I Got, His Favorite

When I Go To A Nude Beach, I Always Take A Ruler, Just In Case I Have To Prove Something.

My Old Man Never Liked Me. He Gave Me My Allowance In Traveler's Checks.

I Have Tried A Little Kinky Stuff. A Woman Called Me And Said, 'i Have Mirrors All Over My Bedroom. Bring A Bottle.' I Brought Windex.

I've Never Been Lucky. The Day My Ship Came In, I Was At The Airport.

Once I Opened Up A Fortune Cookie And Inside Was The Guy's Cheque Next To Me I Said Hey Buddy I Got Your Cheque He Said Thanks.