Once I Opened Up A Fortune Cookie

With My Doctor, I Don't Get No Respect. I Told Him I Want A Vasectomy. He Said With A Face Like Mine, I Don't Need One.

I Once Had A Problem ... So I Tried Group Sex. Now I Have A New Problem - Who To Thank.

We Lived In A Neighborhood That Was Too Rich For Us. When I Was Young, I Had To Deliver Groceries To The Homes Of The Kids I Went To School With. I Had To Go To The Back Doors To Make The Deliveries. It Was Embarrassing. That Was One Thing Out Of A Hundred.

I Told My Wife 'hey Honey Come On, Let's Make Love Like The Old Days.' She Asked Me For 50 Bucks.

You Don't Know Who To Believe. Like Abraham Lincoln. He Said All Men Were Created Equal. He Never Went To A Nude Beach.