Times Don't Change. Men Do.

Give Your Child A Spanking Once A Day. If You Don't Know Why, He Does.

Just Try To Be Happy. Unhappiness Starts With Wanting To Be Happier.

If You Owe Fifty Dollars You're A Piker; If You Owe Fifty Thousand Dollars You're A Businessman; If You Owe Fifty Million Dollars You're A Tycoon; If You Owe Fifty Billion Dollars You're The Government.

The Beauty Of America Is That The Average Person Always Thinks She Is Above Average.

The Reason Grandparents And Grandchildren Get Along So Well Is That They Have A Common Enemy.