There Is Only One Way To Solve

Why Do You Think The Lottery Is So Popular? Do You Think Anybody Would Play If The Super Payoff Was A Job On The Night Shift In A Meat-packing Plant? People Play It So If They Win They Can Be Rich And Idle. Like I Told You Years Ago - If Work Is So Good, How Come They Have To Pay Us To Do It?

Hating The Yankees Is As American As Pizza Pie, Unwed Mothers, And Cheating On Your Income Tax.

When I Conducted A Beer-rating Session Last Year, I Wrote That Most American Beers Taste As If They Were Brewed Through A Horse. That Offended Many People In The American Beer Industry, As Well As Patriots Who Thought I Was Being Subversive In Praising Foreign Beers. I Have Just Read A Little-known Study Of American Beers. So I Must Apologize To The Horse. At Least With A Horse, We'd Know What We're Getting.

Hollywood Is Right. A Good And Strong Movie Can Have A More Powerful Social Impact Than Any And All Political Speeches Or Newspaper Editorials And Columns.

It's Unnatural For People To Run Around The City Streets Unless They Are Thieves Or Victims. It Makes People Nervous To See Someone Running. I Know That When I See Someone Running On My Street, My Instincts Tell Me To Let The Dog Go After Him.