The Other Night I Was Playing Twister

When Someone Describes Themself As A Taxpayer, They're About To Be An Asshole.

I Don't Usually Fly In First Class, But I Fart In First Class.

I Feel So Fortunate To Be One Of The Lucky Ones Who Is So Grateful And Appreciative To Know Such Great Synonyms For Thankful.

You Get Really Disillusioned, Because You Thought You Were In Love. But You Realize That You're Just Alone.

There Are Two Kinds Of Jackets - Reversible, And Reversible But It's Hard To Zipper Up And It Looks Really Stupid.