The Only Real Laughter Comes From Despair.

Each Morning When I Open My Eyes I Say To Myself: I, Not Events, Have The Power To Make Me Happy Or Unhappy Today.

If Women Dressed For Men, The Stores Wouldn't Sell Much - Just An Occasional Sun Visor.

Budget: A Way Of Going Broke Methodically

If We Had Some Eggs We Could Have Eggs And Ham, If We Had Some Ham.

I Know, I Know - You're A Woman Who's Had A Lot Of Tough Breaks. Well, We Can Clean And Tighten Those Brakes, But You'll Have To Stay In The Garage All Night.