...the Elephant Smoked Too Much.

I Don't Mind Going Back To Daylight Saving Time. With Inflation, The Hour Will Be The Only Thing I've Saved All Year.

I Normally Don't Do Requests. Unless, Of Course, I Have Been Asked To Do So.

You Want Something By Bach? Which One, Johann Sebastian Or Jacques Offen?

The Conductor Is A Peculiar Person. He Turns His Back On His Friends In The Audience, Shakes A Stick At His Players In The Orchestra, And Then Wonders Why Nobody Loves Him.

Many People Have Asked Me Why There Are Three Pedals In These Grand Pianos. Well The Pedal In The Middle Is There To Separate The Two Other Pedals.