Sadness Is Just Another Word For Not

God Designs People's Emotions So You Fall In Love With People Who, In Return, Wouldn't Even Use Your Hollowed-out Skull For A Spittoon.

I Can't Bring Myself To Believe In A God With A Personality Like My Own. I Base That On The Paucity Of Lightning Attacks On People Who Deserve It.

Needing Someone Is Like Needing A Parachute. If They Are Not There The First Time You Need Them, Chances Are You Won't Be Needing Them Again.

Nothing Defines Humans Better Than Their Willingness To Do Irrational Things In The Pursuit Of Phenomenally Unlikely Payoffs. This Is The Principle Behind Lotteries, Dating, And Religion.

If I Liked Food And Disliked Exercise As Much As A 400 Pound Guy, I'd Be A 400 Pound Guy.