Our Dog Died From Licking Our Wedding

The Constants All Through The Centuries Will Be The Same; Wine, Women And Song. Other Than That, Life Will Be Very Different Technologically. In The Year 3000 The Universe Will Be Expanding As It Will Forever, Infinitely. We Will Probe Outer Space But Never Find Life As Evolutionized As Ours. We Were Not Created By A Deity. We Created The Deity In Our Image. Life Began On This Planet When The First Amoeba Split. Mankind Will Still Be Seeking God, Not Accepting That God Is A Spirit; Can't See It, Touch It, Only Feel It. It's Called Love.

Tranquilizers Work Only If You Follow The Advice On The Bottle - Keep Away From Children.

It's Hard To Find A Negligee In My Size. I Wear A Junior Mister.

My Sister-in-law Is So Skinny That She Has A Striped Dress With Only One Stripe.

There's Such A Buildup Of Crud In My Oven, There's Only Room To Bake A Single Cupcake.