My Father Used To Call Me The

I Should Have Suspected My Husband Was Lazy. On Our Wedding Day, His Mother Told Me: "i'm Not Losing A Son; I'm Gaining A Couch."

My Mother-in-law Must Be The Probation Officer I Got For The Crime I Committed Of Marrying My Husband.

Carry An Oar When You Drive. Three Times I've Ended Up In Water.

I Was So Wrinkled I Could Screw My Hats On.

Best Way To Get Rid Of Kitchen Odors: Eat Out.