My Uncle Is A Southern Planter. He's

He's So Small, He's A Waste Of Skin.

He Dreamed He Was Eating Shredded Wheat And Woke Up To Find The Mattress Half Gone.

A Telescope Will Magnify A Star A Thousand Times, But A Good Press Agent Can Do Even Better.

All I Know About Humor Is That I Don't Know Anything About It.

To A Newspaperman, A Human Being Is An Item With Skin Wrapped Around It.