My Mother Always Said Don't Marry For

I Just Got My First Bikini. It's A Three-piece: A Top, A Botton, And A Blindfold For You.

I've Been Pitching A Show Of Five Female Stand-up Comedians Through The Generations, From Phyllis Diller To Amy Schumer, So When I Got An E-mail Asking Me If I Would Participate In The Women In Comedy Festival, I Was Thrilled.

I'm Going To Get Married Again Because I'm More Mature Now, And I Need Some Kitchen Stuff.

People Always Come Up To Me And Say That My Smoking Is Bothering Them....well It's Killing Me!

I Went To The 30th Reunion Of My Preschool. I Didn't Want To Go, Because I've Put On Like A Hundred Pounds.