I've Been On So Many Blind Dates,

I've Been On So Many Blind Dates, I Should Get A Free Dog.

People Always Come Up To Me And Say That My Smoking Is Bothering Them....well It's Killing Me!

I'm Going To Get Married Again Because I'm More Mature Now, And I Need Some Kitchen Stuff.

I've Been Pitching A Show Of Five Female Stand-up Comedians Through The Generations, From Phyllis Diller To Amy Schumer, So When I Got An E-mail Asking Me If I Would Participate In The Women In Comedy Festival, I Was Thrilled.

I Think There Have Always Been Funny Women, From Carol Burnett To Joan Rivers. When The Audience Sees A Woman, They Innately Know She's Worked Twice As Hard To Get There, She's Had To Prove That She Can Be The Leader, First, And Then Be Funny On Top Of It. She Has To Emit A Confidence That She's In Control.