I Found Out Why Cats Drink Out

I Took An Acting Class. After The First Day, The Teacher Quit, So They Said Take Another. When I Saw 'how To Be A Stand-up Comedian,' It Resonated. I Realized I'd Rather Make 200 People Laugh Than Make One Person Cry.

I Think There Have Always Been Funny Women, From Carol Burnett To Joan Rivers. When The Audience Sees A Woman, They Innately Know She's Worked Twice As Hard To Get There, She's Had To Prove That She Can Be The Leader, First, And Then Be Funny On Top Of It. She Has To Emit A Confidence That She's In Control.

My Husband Wanted One Of Those Big-screen Tvs For His Birthday. So I Just Moved His Chair Closer To The One We Have Already.

I've Been On So Many Blind Dates, I Should Get A Free Dog.

In Addition To Comedy, I'm A Writer. I Write Checks. They're Not Very Good.