Movie Actors Are Just Ordinary, Mixed-up People

Women Speak Because They Wish To Speak, Whereas A Man Speaks Only When Driven To Speak By Something Outside Himself Like, For Instance, He Can't Find Any Clean Socks.

I Once Truly Believed That If I Had To Stand In Line For Twenty Minutes To Have A Package Gift-wrapped It Actually Gave The Recipient More Pleasure.

A Lawyer Is Never Entirely Comfortable With A Friendly Divorce, Anymore Than A Good Mortician Wants To Finish His Job And Then Have The Patient Sit Up On The Table.

It Has Been Explained To Me That Toys Are Packaged In Shards, To Be Assembled By The Middle-aged And Butter-fingered, Because This Makes It Easier For The Shippers. ... If They Had To Spend Hours And Hours Putting Handlebars Onto Bicycles ... They Would Repent Their Ways And Deliver Something That Looked Like A Rocking Horse And Not Like The Result Of A Small Street Accident.

If You Can Keep Your Head When All About You Are Losing Theirs, It's Just Possible You Haven't Grasped The Situation.