Look Out For Number One And Try

What A Doctor I've Got - He's Really Mixed Up. Last Week, He Grabbed My Knee And Told Me To Cough. Then Hit Me In The Balls With A Hammer.

I Saved A Girl From Being Attacked Last Night. I Controlled Myself.

I Knew A Girl So Ugly, I Took Her To The Top Of The Empire State Building And Planes Started To Attack Her.

My Son's An Idiot. He Sprained His Ankle Playing Golf. He Fell Off The Ballwasher.

One Time My Whole Family Played Hide And Seek. They Found My Mother In Pittsburgh!