Look Out For Number One And Try

When I Was A Kid I Got No Respect. I Played Hide-and-seek. They Wouldn't Even Look For Me.

I Once Dated A Girl That Was Wild. She Was So Wild That One Night She Gave Her Phone Number To The Mechanical Bull.

I Got Myself Good This Morning Too. I Did My Pushups In The Nude, I Didn't See The Mouse Trap.

I Have Nothing But Troubles With My Car. Every Sunday I Take My Family Out For A Push.

At My Age I'm Envious Of A Stiff Wind.