Keep At Least One Window Pane Clean

I'm Beginning To Have Morning Sickness. I'm Not Having A Baby, I'm Just Sick Of Morning.

When You Play Spin The Bottle, If They Don't Want To Kiss You They Have To Give You A Quarter. Well, Hell, By The Time I Was Twelve Years Old I Owned My Own Home.

I'm Eighteen Years Behind In My Ironing. There's No Use Doing It Now, It Doesn't Fit Anybody I Know.

Your Husband Is Lazy If The Directions On His Medicine Say, "a Teaspoon Before Going To Bed," And In One Day He Uses Seven Bottles.

I'd Love To Slit My Mother-in-law's Corsets And Watch Her Spread To Death.