I Really Think Everything Is Fair Game.

And Then Before Going Back For My Sophomore Year, I Decided To Change My Major To Arts And Sciences, And My Dad Cut A Deal With Me: He Said If I'd Quit School He'd Pay My Rent For The Next Three Years, As If I Were In School.

I Was Paralyzed With Fear. It Was Unbearable To Be Among Other Kids Who Were Just Standing Around Being Fine. It Was One Of The Many Inconveniences Of This Paradox I Lived With -the More People I Was Surrounded By, The More Frighteningly Alone I Felt.

I'm A Total One-hour Drama Addict. I Think When You're A Comedian, You Tend Towards Dramas Because That's The Less Stressful Thing To Watch.

Comedy Can't Live Within My Second-guesses, So I Started Doing New Material. Sometimes I Bombed. But You Have To Be Willing To If You Want To Move Forward And Stay Vital. It's Like People Who Take Pride In Not Having A Computer. I'm All, "great, Don't Learn New Things! Your Brain Is Full!"

I Looked Up And Saw The Shape Of A Heart Made By The Silhouette Of Ben Affleck And Matt Damon Kissing.