I Became Known For Surprising Audiences. Except

I Have No Religion. But Culturally I Can't Escape It; I'm Very Jewish.

Since So Many People These Days Don't Seem To Start Their Families Until Around Age Forty, I Predict There Will Be Less Child Beating, But More Slipped Disks From Lifting Babies Out Of Cribs. Even The Father Of Advanced Age Who's Not Inclined To Spare The Rod Is Likely To Suffer More Than His Victim: The First Punch He Throws Might Well Be The Last Straw For His Rotator Cuff, Reducing His Disciplinary Options To Mere Verbal Abuse And Napping.

You Know, I Think Whatever A Comic Talks About Onstage Is All They Talk About Offstage.

The First Time I Did Stand-up Was The Summer I Was 17.

If My Catholic Boyfriend And I Ever Have A Kid, We'll Just Be Honest With It. We'll Say That Mommy Is One Of God's Chosen People, And Daddy Believes That Jesus Is Magic!