I Like My Women To Be Feminine,

Don't Send Me Flowers When I'm Dead. If You Like Me, Send Them While I'm Alive.

I’ve Decided To Pick My Moment To Retire Very Carefully – In About 200 Years’ Time.

Bill Eventually Became Mr Tottenham Hotspur, And Produced Such A Dazzling Team At White Hart Lane That They Won The Double And Played The Game In A Way That Was An Object Lesson To Everybody.

We Had A Good Team On Paper. Unfortunately, The Game Was Played On Grass.

Being Thick Isn't An Affliction If You're A Footballer, Because Your Brains Need To Be In Your Feet. And Beckham Works Hard, He's Brave And He Crosses A Ball Superbly. He Treats A Football Like He Does A Wife, Lovingly, With Caresses.