Home Is Where You Hang Your Head.

When I Invite A Woman To Dinner, I Expect Her To Look At My Face. That's The Price She Has To Pay.

He's So Full Of Alcohol, If You Put A Lighted Wick In His Mouth He'd Burn For Three Days.

A Thing That Has Always Baffled Me About Women Is That They Will Saturate Themselves With A Pint Of Perfume, A Pound Of Sachet Powder, An Evil-smelling Lip Rouge, A Peculiar-smelling Hair Ointment And A Half-dozen Varieties Of Body Oils, And Then Have The Effrontery To Complain Of The Aroma Of A Fine Dollar Cigar.

I've Known And Respected Your Husband For Many Years, And What's Good Enough For Him Is Good Enough For Me

The Months Before My Son Was Born, I Used To Yell From Night To Morn, 'whatever It Is, I'm Against It! No Matter What It Is Or Who Commenced It, I'm Against It!'