A Lot Of People Have Asked Me

I'll Never Make Another Hardy Picture . . . I'm Fed Up With These Dopey, Insipid Parts. How Long Can A Guy Play A Jerk Kid? I'm 27 Years Old. I've Been Divorced Once And Separated From My Second Wife. I Have Two Boys Of My Own. I Spent Almost Two Years In The Army. It's Time Judge Hardy Went Out And Bought Me A Double-breasted Suit.

Someone Once Asked Me What I Want On My Epitaph When I Pass Away. Just The Words 'i Tried.' That's What This Game Of Life Is All About. Trying. There's The Tryers, The Criers, And The Liars.

It's Confusing. I've Had So Many Wives And So Many Children I Don't Know Which House To Go To First On Christmas.

I Was A Thirteen-year-old Boy For Thirty Years.

John Frances, Entertainment Chair, Of The Friars Club: Of All The Roasts That I Have Produced For The Friars Club, This Is The One That I Am Most Excited About. Mickey Is One Of The Club's Dearest Friends, And We Wanted To Honor Him In The Way We Know Best.