A Clown Is Like Aspirin, Only He

While Money Can't Buy Happiness, It Certainly Lets You Choose Your Own Form Of Misery.

If We Had Some Eggs We Could Have Eggs And Ham, If We Had Some Ham.

Many Years Ago I Chased A Woman For Almost Two Years, Only To Discover That Her Tastes Were Exactly Like Mine: We Both Were Crazy About Girls.

[he] May Talk Like An Idiot, And Look Like An Idiot, But Don't Let That Fool You: He Really Is An Idiot.

Those Are My Principles, And If You Don't Like Them... Well, I Have Others.