You Might Be A Redneck If Your

Women In Bed Are Like Diesel Engines. What I Mean By That Is, It May Take Them A While To Get Going, But When You Do, They Can Go For A Long, Long Time. Whereas Men Are Like... Bottle Rockets.

You Might Be A Redneck If The Hood And One Door Are A Different Color From The Rest Of Your Car.

If Your Neighbors Think You're A Detective Because A Cop Always Brings You Home, You Might Be A Redneck.

We Sing About God Because We Believe In Him. We Are Not Trying To Offend Anybody, But The Evidence That We Have Seen Of Him In Our Small Little Lives Trumps Your Opinion About Whether Or Not He Exists.

I've Gotten To The Point I Won't Even Watch The 11 O'clock News. You Just Walk Away From It Thinking How Bad Everything Is.