You Know How To Tell When You're

Old Age Is When Broadness Of The Mind And Narrowness Of The Waist Change Places.

Television: The Device That Brings Into Your Living Room Characters You Would Never Allow In Your Living Room.

I've Put On A Lot Of Weight... I Only Weighed Six And A Half Pounds When I Was Born.

Today's Comics Use Four-letter Words As A Shortcut To Thinking. They're Shooting For That Big Laugh And It Becomes A Panic Thing, Using Four-letter Words To Shock People.

I Was A Sober As The Next Guy. The Only Problem Is The Next Guy Was Dean Martin