You Can't Claim You're For Peace If

Atheism Is A Religion The Way Abstinence Is A Sex Position.

Everything That Used To Be A Sin Is Now A Disease.

They Told Us To Buy Duct Tape And Portable Radios So That If The World Does End, We Can All Listen To Rush Limbaugh Blame It On Clinton.

I Was Out At The Hbo Party, These Are Liberals, I Imagine, And A Lot Of People Came Up To Me And Said, "keep Giving It To The President."

Don't Call Me When You're Stuck In Traffic. It's Not My Fault That Radio Sucks And Did It Ever Occur To You That There Wouldn't Be So Much Traffic If People Like You Put Down The Phone And Concentrated On The Road... Besides I Can't Talk Now, I'm In The Car Behind You Trying To Watch A Dvd.