When I Was A Kid I Got

And My Girlfriend, She's Fat! How Fat? She's So Fat She Wears Two Watches-one For Each Time Zone!

I Tell Ya, I Know The Best Way To Get Girls. I Hang Out At Women's Prisons, And Wait For Parolees.

I Went To A Massage Parlor, It Was Self Service.

I Told My Dentist I Want A Tooth To Match The Others. He Gave My One With Four Cavities.

I Was So Ugly My Parents Had To Hang A Pork Chop Around My Neck To Get The Dog To Play With Me.