When I Played In The Sandbox, The

My Wife Isn't Very Bright. The Other Day She Was At The Store, And Just As She Was Heading For Our Car, Someone Stole It! I Said, "did You See The Guy That Did It?" She Said, "no, But I Got The License Plate."

You Live With Life's Disappointments And Learn From Them. At Seventy-eight, I Know It All.

If Sex Is A Pain In The Ass, Then You're Doing It Wrong.

Last Week I Told My Wife, If You Would Learn To Cook, I Could Fire The Chef. She Said, If You Could Learn To Make Love, I Could Fire The Chauffer.

I Drink Too Much, Way Too Much; My Doctor Drew Blood He Ran A Tab!