I Don't Get No Respect, No Respect

It's Tough To Stay Married. My Wife Kisses The Dog On The Lips, Yet She Won't Drink From My Glass.

My Wife Made Me Join A Bridge Club... I Jump Off Next Tuesday.

I Come From A Stupid Family. During The Civil War My Great Uncle Fought For The West.

I Met The Surgeon General - He Offered Me A Cigarette.

My Wife Only Has Sex With Me For A Purpose. Last Night It Was To Time An Egg.