When Humor Goes, There Goes Civilization.

A Grandparent Will Accept Your Calls From Anywhere, Collect.

You Show Me A Boy Who Brings A Snake Home To His Mother And I'll Show You An Orphan.

A Child Needs Your Love Most When He Deserves It Least

The Odds Of Going To The Store For A Loaf Of Bread And Coming Out With Only A Loaf Of Bread Are Three Billion To One.

There Are Few Things In This World More Satisfying Than Having Your Son Teach You How To Play Tennis, Unless It Is Having A Semi-truck Run Over Your Foot.