When Deciding Between Two Competing Theories, Always

Once I Was In A Restaurant And I Dropped My Fork On The Floor, And They Gave Me A New Fork. So I Pushed My Girlfriend Out Of Her Chair.

I'm Learning Cuban. It's Like Spanish, But With Fewer Words For Luxury Items.

I've Been Wrestling With Reality For Most Of My Life. I'm Pleased To Say I've Won.

Christmas Seems To Start Earlier And Earlier Every Year. Like, This Time, It's On December 25th.

The Way I Understand It, The Russians Are Sort Of A Combination Of Evil And Incompetence... Sort Of Like The Post Office With Tanks.