When An Opera Star Sings Her Head

Clarinets, Like Lawyers, Have Cases, Mouthpieces, And They Need A Constant Supply Of Hot Air In Order To Function.

How Nice. Now The Germans Can Sleep In Peace, Knowing That They Will Not Be Invaded By Us.

And Now, In Honour Of The 150th Anniversary Of Beethoven's Death, I Would Like To Play 'clear The Saloon', Er, 'clair De Lune', By Debussy. I Don't Play Beethoven So Well, But I Play Debussy Very Badly, And Beethoven Would Have Liked That.

Laughter Is The Closest Distance Between Two People.

It (the Double-clarinet In India) Was Primarily Used For Snake Charming, Since The Snake Would Do Almost Anything To Get The Indians To Stop Playing It.