Went To The Paper Shop - It

I Went To The Dentist. He Said "say Aaah." I Said "why?" He Said "my Dog's Died."

So I Went To The Chinese Restaurant And This Duck Came Up To Me With A Red Rose And Says "your Eyes Sparkle Like Diamonds". I Said "waiter, I Asked For A-romatic Duck".

I Had A Ploughman's Lunch The Other Day. He Wasn't Very Happy.

A Man Walked Into The Doctor's, The Doctor Said 'i Haven't Seen You In A Long Time' The Man Replied, 'i Know I've Been Ill'.

So I Was In Tesco's And I Saw This Man And Woman Wrapped In A Barcode. I Said "are You Two An Item?"