I'm On A Whisky Diet. I've Lost

Went To The Corner Shop - Bought 4 Corners.

'doc, I Can't Stop Singing The Green Green Grass Of Home. 'that Sounds Like Tom Jones Syndrome'. 'is It Common?' 'it's Not Unusual.'

A Woman Tells Her Doctor, 'i've Got A Bad Back.' The Doctor Says, 'it's Old Age.' The Woman Says, 'i Want A Second Opinion.' The Doctor Says: 'okay - You're Ugly As Well.'

I Went To Buy Some Camouflage Trousers The Other Day But I Couldn’t Find Any.

A Guy Walks Into A Pub With A Lump Of Asphalt On His Shoulder, He Says To The Bar Man Give Us A Pint And One For The Road.