We Want Five Thousand Dollars Or You'll

What A Kid I Got, I Told Him About The Birds And The Bee And He Told Me About The Butcher And My Wife.

Never Guess Your Wife's Size. Just Buy Anything Marked Petite And Hold On To The Receipt.

I Started Over Again With An Image: Nothing Goes Right. Then When The Godfather Came Out, All I Heard Was, Show Respect. With Me, You Show Respect. So I Changed The Image To I Don't Get No Respect. I Tried It Out In Greenwich Village. I Remember The First Joke I Told: Even As A Kid, I'd Play Hide And Seek And The Other Kids Wouldn't Even Look For Me. The People Laughed. After The Show, They Started Saying To Me, Me, Too - I Don't Get No Respect. I Figured, Let's Try It Again.

I'm A Bad Lover. Once I Caught A Peeping Tom Booing Me.

I Have Tried A Little Kinky Stuff. A Woman Called Me And Said, 'i Have Mirrors All Over My Bedroom. Bring A Bottle.' I Brought Windex.