We Want Five Thousand Dollars Or You'll

I'm A Bad Lover. Once I Caught A Peeping Tom Booing Me.

At Christmas Time We Couldn't Afford Tinsel, So We'd Wait Till Grandpa Sneezed.

I Once Went Out With This Girl, She Was No Bargain Either, She Showed Up With Pigtails Under Her Arms.

I Went To A Fight The Other Night, And A Hockey Game Broke Out.

I Was An Ugly Kid; When I Was Born, After The Doctor Cut The Cord, He Hung Himself.